Miss Lola. Oh how much she has grown... She is a little shit for sure. She plays a lot better with the cats now. Dude still hasnt gotten the full understanding of she just wants to play... LOL She has gotten potty training down to a pat.. (score). She walks into her crate with out fighting.. (another score).. She has stopped peeing in her crate.. (epic win there) and she has learned simple normal commands.. (yes i rock)..
As chad calls them now, The Double D's.. (Daniel and dude).. LOL Daniel has became very clingy since the hubs is gone.. He always does.. it sucks.. he gets mad when i kick him out of the bedroom at night.. haha Dude, well is still dude.. stupid and smelly... I swear this cat's breath smells like something died in there... Can you brush cat's teeth.??
The Hubs.. well he is at sea right now... Ya, whats new.. lol For some reason this underway is so much harder then i ever thought. I wish he would just get home already.. few more weeks.. Lame yes but ill deal..
Now for the things i need to vent about..
Ok first off.. Lola is not the most common name for a dog.. In fact its not that common for people either... But who goes and names her dog Lola, (3 weeks after i do).. Brittany Yager.. Seriously!!!! Just because i dont want you back in my life you have to make my life yours... You cant even take care of your fucking kid let alone take care of a fucking dog... Its irrating.. Like you say you cant get a job.. You live in a fucking room in the back of the dance studio with your babys daddy.. THAT DOESNT EVEN LOVE YOU ANYMORE!!! Its funny how 3 weeks after i get my dog you get yours. You name it the same. You talk about her the same way i did on my facebook... But yet i deleted your ass.. So now i have to go delete everyone your friends with because they are passing my info along.. great!
Second, Friends.. Really if you say you are my friend then be there.. When i call to talk about something that is bothering me.. STOP talking about your fucking boy problems.. boy problems that can be easily fixed if you would pull your head out of your ass... I love her to death.. i really do!! BUT after listening to the same bitching weeks in a row and you still dont take the advice.. Then just stop.. I called you to talk to you about something that was really under my skin and you turned the whole FUCKING convo to you and the boy... Like what happened to a friend just listening.. Have you asked me whats wrong with me lately.. Why i have been having a hard time while my husband is gone... Did you ever think to stop and ask me how my day is... No you dont.. I hate it.. I understand this will pass but i can only take this shit for so long..
I need a friend to talk to ... I hate always being the one everyone else turnes to and no one is there for me... I have problems too.. I have feelings too.. I need to vent too... But 99.9% of the "friends" i have wont listen to me when i need it...
Example: A friend told me i could call her if i need to talk.. well i called her and she was so stoned she didnt even realize it was me... Ok i have no problem smoking a bowl every blue moon but wtf... You could have just not answered and texted me and told me "hey im stoned and i dont want to not listen to you.. Call me tomorrow"... Simple.. easy and i would understand...
Just kinda over begin everyone's fucking rug.. Im human too ya know..
Third.... I'm totally over feeling like shit... I want to feel pretty again.. I want to feel happy again.. I want to feel like me again... And i hate to say it but i think i might need meds to do that... Next week when i go in for my knee im going to talk to my doctor about some antidepressant meds.. I dont want to get addicted to them tho.. That's all im scared about... Wish there was another way but i know there isnt.. I'm gonna try counseling yes but i know that's not always gonna work...
And fourth.. I'm soooooOOOOO sick of the drama from my past keeps coming back... Ok i understand at one point i was best friends with this girl Country.. BUT things went south and now we hate each other.. She found me on facebook.. I dont know if she made it because of me but by what ive heard.. She wanted to fuck with me.. "cant wait to hear from you bitch".. Now that doesn't sound like it was meant for me at all.. nope.. Whatever... I'm so irritated that she is back around but once again im not surprised... That is also why i had to shut everything down.. My facebook, twitter, and this... So she cant find it and read it... sucks i have to hide my life because of people like that.. But they just dont ever grow up.. Maybe one day.. but right now.. at 26 she still cant understand, Ive moved on and so should she...
My rant is over for now.. LOL Now i gotta get to bed before i fall asleep..
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