The Noodle in Me

Now this post is coming from my thoughts and past. Please don't judge me.

I have been looking around facebook and have seen a lot of military wive sites. Ive added a few here and there.. They understand my pain and know what im talking about. As i read through these sites and see all the many different posts, i see ones that just makes me so angry.  Military wives airing their dirty laundry. Ok yes ive done something similar but never flat out saying details.  Why would you tell a very public site that you husband beat you??  Why would you flat out OUT him like that??? And why in fucking gods name are you sitting there asking for advice when you KNOW you should leave his sorry ass.  He hits you once and stay because of the kids. He hits you twice and you think he is done. IF A MAN CAN HIT A WOMEN ONCE, HE CAN DO IT AGAIN!!!!.  I don't see why women don't get that.  

Now i can honestly tell you that yes, its hard to leave a man after her hits you. I had just turned 16 and with a guy for over a year and finally slept with him. I ended up getting pregnant. I told him. He went out and got high or drunk or something. Came back and since my aunt and uncle where out getting dinner he thought it was a good idea to kill the baby before it even starts... He beat me.. got me on the ground and beat the living shit out of me. I have a broken rib and my face was black and blue for 2 months. I knew there was a chance the kid was dead.. I wasn't that far along. But i figured he was just angry i "fucked up his life".. I stayed until i miscarried the child. I then knew i had nothing holding me to him but feelings. I sat there and thought about those feelings and if it was worth the pain in the end.. I vowed i would never end up like my mother.. I would never let a man hit me and me run back. Never ever.  So i left. I gave back the ring and everything he had ever gave me... I understand how it can feel to want to stay because you "love him" but  really and truly. There is no love when a man puts his hands on a women. No matter what!!.. 

So goes for cheating. Why tell the whole world that he is a dick and doesn't want fuck you anymore... Come one girls.. I understand we all need to vent but vent to someone in private or family or someone you really trust. But to vent to the public is like taking his name and forever marking it. In understand  men and women that cheat and hit should be punished but like that. No... Let them eat themselves alive on the inside because they know they hurt someone.. Let them live with that regret.  Its punishment enough knowing what they had is gone and they lost everything they ever worked for.  Speaking of work.. Don't you understand that the military does look at these sites. They look for this shit. Even if you didn't want him to get in trouble, well guess what. You fuck him either way.  Don't think im defending him or her in any way.. But my god people. Its annoying and irritating.. You give military wives a bad name. You make us look stupid and evil and always out to get out men. Makes the men look like dirty bags that cant help but hit us women.. and then we let them by staying with them. You let men do this because he hurt you, you staid, you showed him that no matter what he does. You wont leave.

So bottom line. For all those women out there that know you  man has cheated, cheating, or has the idea to cheat and you still stay. You get what you deserve. For all the women that are beaten over and over because you wont leave. Well you get what you deserve.

To touch on another Navy Wife topic. Well really and truly this whole "i know more then you because i ______"  really. Because your older, a officers wife(half of those stupid fucker don't know REAL NAVY anyways so fuck off), been to more bases, have more friends, been married to it longer....  OK someone that has been married to the Navy for 20 some years may know more then i do. But really, there isn't much i don't already know. Why? Because i ask my husband about things. I ask about his work. I want to know what he does. I want to know the way the ranking systems work. I want to understand what it is he does day in and day out.. WHY?? because i don't want to be that wife that stands their and looks stupid when the guys are talking.. I hate being that wife that knows nothing about what my husband works so hard for everyday.   So yes, i might know more then a wife that just got married a month ago. Or a booters wife because he doesn't even know everything yet. But im not gonna go out there and swear i know it all. Because i know i don't.  I talk about what i do know and leave it at that.